Category: Life
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Inured
My desk has stacks of paper. Yellow envelopes filled with sheets I need to fill, a checklist of largely unchecked items, bills that need follow up, a snowman with one arm and a caption that says I’d melt for you. Each day, I sit at my desk, focusing solely on the words on the screen.…
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Imposters: Life and Death
I lie in bed, in the dark, under the covers, the backlit screen of my phone casting an eerie glow. I am furiously typing or researching what a hip surgery in advanced age looks like. I look at the process, the preoperative parameters, postoperative care and mentally ready myself for all possibilities. I can do…
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Co-opting Words
I sat between my twins, Laddu on my knee as the opening credits for Hidden Figures rolled on the screen. Pattu jiggled her knee, a clear indication she was done waiting for the actual movie to start. I hit pause and gathered the eight-year olds close. “This is a movie for grown-ups. There is a…
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Crushes and Blushes
Pattu says, “Amma, Ammu has a crush on M.” Ammu blushes a deep red. Then I ask Pattu “Do you still crush on L?” Pattu blushes deep red. Ammu tells Pattu “M is just a friend. Not a crush!” Pattu persists until Ammu relents “His name starts with C” We all take turns guessing until…
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Hot Pink Bikes And Time That Zooms Ahead
“I’ll never give up,” Ammu says, her eyes fierce. She straddles the new bike she is testing in the store, balances on her toes and tentatively pushes ahead. The bike wobbles and she stops, tries again and this time sails ahead. She brakes hard and manages not to fall. I watch from my vantage point…
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The Moon Is A Taco And Other Things
I am clearing up the crumbs from breakfast when Pattu’s clear voice calls out to me from beyond the patio door. I take my time, finishing up what I am doing before I walk. She holds up her boogie board, a line drawing that looks suspiciously like an advertisement for a fast food chain. “That’s…
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Leaps Of Faith
We stood near the vintage microwave, a relic from the 80’s J. C. Penney electronics division, a probe sunk partly into the milk, the temperature set to 180 degree Fahrenheit. The sounds of my children running around, jumping on bubble wrap and generally being themselves was incongruous for what was a fledgling office space. Makeshift…
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Coming Home
“Alexa, play songs by Justin Bieber,” commands Pattu. Alexa obliges. The twins dance, arms outstretched, head thrown back, smiles lighting up their faces. They are the picture of abandon. I am struck by the difference. I stand in the kitchen watching them for a while. Ammu notices me and runs up. Her arms are around…
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I Am Jane Doe – Terrifying, Gripping and All Too Real
Late last night, I tucked my youngest into bed and watched her fall asleep before I crept away to the comfort zone that is my laptop. After writing a post that was a look back on 16 years of wedded bliss, I turned to Netflix. I scrolled through the sections aimlessly until my eyes stopped…
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You Are Not Alone
“What is on your mind?” exhorts Facebook when I turn to my phone in a moment of despair “Craptastic (pun intended)” I type and then backspace, watching each letter and my life disappear into an unseen void. My fingers are smudged with dosa batter drying into a white powder that flakes off as my hands…