“Two more days before school starts!”

My youngest literally springs down the steps two at a time, her energy too bright for the morning. I am yet to have my coffee. I am grumpy.

“One more day…” I correct her. “We are already on Saturday. One more day and you start school the following day.”

I feel like the grinch yet, can’t seem to stop myself.

Thankfully for all of us, her energies outweigh mine and my mood lifts. The coffee helps too.

The week counting down to the upcoming Monday has been chaotic. I have been methodically cleaning, room by room, closet by closet. Yesterday I counted over twelve giant bags filled with stuff. Clothes, shoes, winter gear, swim wear and costumes that my children and I have outgrown. The garage looks cleaner, the closets brighter. We went shopping but just got enough to cover us through the next season. Sizes change so much. The children are growing physically and every which way. It is fascinating to watch from the sidelines. It is also anxiety inducing.

It is Saturday and their backpacks are already ready. I know what I am packing for lunch and snack. I have been through every email that has links to presentations by teachers and filled out surveys. I still have a yellow manilla folder full of forms to fill, health questionnaires to answer. I have clothes and only 50 odd reusable masks to wash and keep ready. The children are ready. I am ready.

Delta is giving me pause. I have this sense of impending doom, of schools closing, kids being back on Zoom. I have recurring nightmares of the March of 2020.

My body is reacting viscerally. I am sleepless, my heart races. I have all but forgotten about the work I do for a living. Monday should bring with it changes in more ways than one. I hope my worst fears are just that. Fears.

How have you all been doing? How is back to school looking for you? If your kids are already back at school, how has the return to in person school been? Tell me. Ease my anxiety please.