Category: Love
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Heartbreak Central
I queue up Taylor Swift to start as I enter the car and connect the phone. Say Don’t Go fills the enclosed space. The ride to the bus stop is less than a minute. I park and sing along as loudly as I dare. Pattu joins me. When the lyrics pause and the music takes…
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Boxed In
It is dark when I pull out into our driveway. Pattu is hunched over in the front seat tying her shoe laces. Ammu is in the back seat, headphones covering her ears, looking at the slowly lightening skies, hues of pink and purple in the horizon. The bluetooth connects and Taylor Swift sings “Welcome to…
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Only For A Moment
Most mornings for me lately start with a playlist of Eric Nam’s music. I hum as I cook, do dishes, pack lunches or walk around the house. The lyrics take me to places I haven’t been in a long, long time. They wake up parts of me that have been sleeping for decades. I imagine…
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Letting Go – Anniversary Edition
It is that time of the year when I reflect on what the many years of partnership and marriage mean to me. My relationship with Saathi is a work in progress, one that evolves with time and circumstances. As the both of us navigate middle age and its attendant problems, it is easy to take…
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Something In The Rain
My middle daughter and I stood by the entrance of the studio where we were for her voice lessons, looking out into the pouring rain. Our car was a short walk away. Mulling over whether to wait for the rain to stop or get wet, I asked her if we should do it kdrama style…
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Mother. Daughter. Mother.
“Skipping time” Amma calls out to my prepubescent youngest child who is upstairs talking to a friend over Facetime. I am in the kitchen doing dishes, amused by the interaction. I hear the sound of jumping upstairs as Laddu counts and jumps a hundred times. She is out of breath but rushes proudly to her…
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Kdrama, Saranghae
“Want to see pictures of my crush?” I ask, a goofy smile plastered on my face. My 13-year-old is scandalized. She reluctantly takes my phone and scrolls through the IG feed I show her. She is quiet and after a beat asks me “Are married women allowed to have crushes?” I laugh out loud. She…
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Anniversary: Twenty Years
Nostalgia is part of who I am. I meticulously track birthdays, death days, wedding days, and anniversaries of all kinds. I used to be able to remember dates. I used to call, email, text until my forties hit me with a vengeance. At my last annual physical, I had trouble recalling words in order. I…
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Jaded, Faded.
Laddu was at her school desk painstakingly taping Dum-Dum pops to her dinosaur sticker valentine cards. She was excited. It is all she has been talking about this week. Today, when she is back home, she will bring with her a box full of valentine cards, an assortment of stickers, candy and, adorable handwritten notes…
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COVID-19 Diaries: Anniversary
Nineteen years is a long time. It is even when you factor in the first few years when you are getting to know the person, the next few years when you are struggling to build a family, the years after that are consumed by nurturing this hard-built family. We have both grown. We have both…