Category: Personal
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Gendered Decisions
It is early evening. I type away on my work laptop, wrapping up unfinished work. The crying sounds from above filter through the receiver near my desk. I sigh, push my chair back and sprint upstairs. I pick laddu up and hold her close. Her head slumps on my shoulder and her body relaxes as she…
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Shhh! Surprise!!
I stand on the driveway, laddu in my left arm, her weight starting to tell. The sun beats down mercilessly. The air is pregnant with moisture. My tee-shirt sticks to my back. I feel irritation creep into my voice as ammu and pattu insist there is no better day than today to bike. The heat…
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Lullaby and goodnight
If there is one thing I regret in earnest since laddu was born, it is that I cannot sing to save my life. As I hold and rock her back and forth as she expresses her frustration the only way she knows, I wish from deep within that I could croon to her. That the…
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New beginnings
I woke to the shrill sound of the alarm going off at 5:00 AM. Saathi groaned and suggested snoozing another half hour. I figured it would not hurt and reset the alarm to 5:30 to catch a few more winks of sleep. The next time it beeped, I was up with razor-sharp focus. The next…
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Unharried moments
In a couple of hours, we will wind down what has been an uneventful yet memorable two weeks of staycation. Each day started predictably with the twins snuggling in bed with us. What followed was largely dictated by the weather and where their rich imaginations led them. Some days they built towers with blocks mimicking…
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Warning: Hurt feelings ahead
“If you hurt my feelings one more time…” Pattu looks at Ammu with threatening eyes. Ammu replies hardly looking up from her coloring book “I hurt your feelings already. I hurt you first!” Saathi and I grin across the dining table and file these conversations to retold and enjoyed years later. My mind however is…
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Tooth fairy tales
I walk along the perimeter of my home, the bundle in my hand feeling heavier with each step. I pause as I hear the garage door roll. A smile involuntarily creeps up my face. I heave the baby to my shoulders and open the door. The sun rays slant, lighting up a part of the…
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Letters to my daughters: Milestones
Dear Laddu, My left palm rests on the top of your head. The warmth from me seeping into you, lulling you into sleep. You smile in your sleep. I find myself mirroring you. The apples of your cheek shine with the sheen of the coconut oil I massaged into your skin. It was not too…
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The Things We Treasure
Few things are in my possession that I treasure. Over the years, it has been books, mementoes from childhood. With every move a few have been lost, misplaced or given away. Some things, however, come into our lives and transform it. The year was 2005. It was mid October. The season when leaves fall, trees…
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Unexpected discoveries: Finding myself
I cut the conversation short. I feel relief as I continue loading the dishes. The disenchantment I feel is typed away in 140 characters or less but I refrain from hitting post. The picture of all three of my daughters in one frame begs me to upload to Facebook, but I demur. I look at…