My calf muscles and hamstrings are sore from bending over one too many times. This time I am on my knees and elbows reaching for a hard to reach inflated ball that is wedged right in the middle of the futon width. I let out a string of curses knowing no one can hear me. […]
Read moreSpaces
I walk around my home, my iWatch tracking my steps, urging me to walk 11 minutes more at a brisk pace so my move goal could be met. I walk, my arms swinging, my eyes tracking my children as each play in their own way. Laddu is astride her soft, stuffed unicorn, urging it to […]
Read moreBig Little Things
The clock is yet to strike 8:00 am. The twins and Saathi have left for school and work. Laddu is still at the island dipping her coin dosais in a mix of thayir and chutney and savoring each morsel. I make my round picking up coffee mugs, discarded plates, and crumbs on the floor. A […]
Read moreThe Making Of A Home
It is nearly 2:00 in the afternoon and I realize with a start that I have not had a chance to sit down yet. I am not sure what I have been doing so I sit down and actually make a list. Make coffee Unload dishwasher Make eggplant fry Pressure cook rice Make almond chutney […]
Read moreYou Are Not Alone
“What is on your mind?” exhorts Facebook when I turn to my phone in a moment of despair “Craptastic (pun intended)” I type and then backspace, watching each letter and my life disappear into an unseen void. My fingers are smudged with dosa batter drying into a white powder that flakes off as my hands […]
Read moreBad Days. Good Days.
Laddu and I stand by the dining room window looking out. Ammu and Pattu walk home, their backpacks bouncing on their back. Their fine hair moves with the breeze. In identical rompers, they sprint the last few yards home. I am now by the door to the garage, waiting with a smile. “I had a […]
Read moreThe unimagined future
I swing with Laddu on my hip swaying to the upbeat tempo of Mental Manadhil. She shrieks with laughter as I do. We circle in the tiny space between the stove and the kitchen island. As I turn, I notice the okra smoking on the stove. I rush to turn the heat down and salvage […]
Read moreRight here. Right now.
The baby swing in the back yard sways in the breeze. I notice Ammu and Pattu in my peripheral vision trying to dislodge a ‘popsicle’ from the faucet on the outside of the house. It is bitterly cold. My nose burns. I feel alive. I glance absently at the stretch of road visible from my […]
Read moreNostalgia
Dusty. The tar roads felt soft to my flip-flops as I walked to the house for the first time. The summer heat scorched the city when we moved from cooler, less humid climes there. It was a modest house. I remember lying awake at night as the rain pelted the windows and listening to frogs […]
Read moreTis the time for thanks
I watch as Saathi cajoles and sweet talks the twins into posing for pictures. It is a regular Sunday. Toys are lined on the stairs leading to our upper level. Laughter reverberates around the home. I watch dad and daughters soak up each other and feel a pang. This time of the year reminds me […]
Read moreThe smell of memories
I stand by the sizzling tawa pouring the batter and swirling it into a geometric shape. You stand by my side on a little chair, the top of your head nuzzled against my side. My left arm is positioned across your trunk protectively to keep the heat and oil from getting to you. You lean […]
Read moreTaking pause
The sunlight streams in from the mullioned window in the foyer. I pass the room where your toys lie scattered. A momentary annoyance creases my face. I stand debating if I should clear it up or have the two of you do it when you are back from school. I pass your bedrooms. The crumpled […]
Read moreWeathervane
The clock inches past six in the evening. I slice and dice tomatoes, my ears alert for sounds of the garage door opening. Even as I turn the stove on, I hear them. A smile plays on my face as I open the door. Saathi wordlessly hands over lunch bags, banana peels and art work […]
Read moreThe lightness of being
I set my laptop on the kitchen island, set the saute pan on the stove and turned the music on. As I tempered and seasoned the vegetables, I swayed to the music. I let the music possess my soul and let go of inhibitions. “Mommy look! I do just like you!” I turned to see […]
Read moreMidsummer Musings
Waving the spouse and kids off, I walked around my home. The weeds and the tall grass stood out in sharp relief. Sighing, I made my way inside as the sight of the rose bushes by the front caught my eye. The profusion of color made me stop and the weeds merged with the background. […]
Read moreRoom with a view
I look at the clock. It is a quarter to 3:00 PM. A little late for lunch I decide and whip up a churumuri kind of snack. Salad veggies chopped, a pinch of masala, a spoon of chutney and leftover mixture. I settle back on my chair and work while I eat. I could get […]
Read moreHolding on to memories and traditions – Navarathri
It was past 9:00 PM this past Tuesday. K looked weary. I was tired. Are you sure? K asked. For a moment I wavered. Perhaps it was simpler to not make the effort. To blame work and kids and life for the lack of energy. I nodded. While K picked up the stray toy in […]
Read moreLetting go. Holding tight.
I shuffle and drag my weary feet to the sink, rinse my plate in the cool water, let it drip and on an afterthought, leave it in the sink. I rest my hands on the ledge debating. I let it be. Drying my hands on the moist towel, I flick the kitchen lights off and […]
Read moreRemembering Appa
Driving into work today, I decided to give the earphones a pass and tuned into NPR. There was the news about Libya and then something about predator drones and my mind was weaving in and out, the sound bytes alternatively being loud and fading out. The weather and traffic updates followed. Then was this story […]
Read moreA Baby(ies) changes everything!
Back home after an incredibly short but eventful trip home to India, I woke earlier than usual. Bustling in the kitchen getting ready to go back to work after a two week break, images from my trip played out in a continual loop in my head. The fervent packing and the final drive to the […]
Read moreAlmonds, chocolate and a little love
I ambled along, lunch tote in hand, in no particular hurry. I had my leftovers from the weekend. As I crossed the set of steel tables on my way to the microwave, I ran into a new colleague. New because I was new to the company as was she. Remarking on a single stemmed rose […]
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