Motherhood, Musings, SAHM

Mommy Tax

Laddu is on the kitchen island, her legs dangling off the edge. Large sunglasses cover more than half her face. I am feeling reflective and in the mood for conversation. “What is your destiny?” I ask as a follow-up to our discussion on the show Ever After High. She blinks. I go back to the […]

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Musings, SAHM

Leaning In

The sambar bubbles merrily on the back stove. The vegetables in the sambar are just done, not mushy, not too hard. The color is a golden yellow. The smell of ghee elevates the whole experience. The only thing missing is coriander. The okra is crisping evenly, specks of brown amid the green. I smile to […]

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Musings, SAHM

The Struggle Is Real

“You are burning up!” I yell at someone in my dream. The feeling is too real. I wake up with a gasp and realize that Laddu is in bed, her arm resting on mine. Her skin is hot to touch. I touch her forehead and with a sigh push the covers off and make my […]

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Home, Homemaker, Musings

The Making Of A Home

It is nearly 2:00 in the afternoon and I realize with a start that I have not had a chance to sit down yet. I am not sure what I have been doing so I sit down and actually make a list. Make coffee Unload dishwasher Make eggplant fry Pressure cook rice Make almond chutney […]

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Musings

Evaluating Worth

Saathi and I are at the kitchen island, he is chopping broccoli, I am mostly done with prep work for lunch. The children are yet to wake. I am feeling refreshed. The kind of freshness you feel when you have had a good nights sleep. I say something to that effect and Saathi brings up […]

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Motherhood, Musings, SAHM

On Motherhood and Curated Lives

I woke up to outrage on social media yesterday over the remarks of a minor celeb in India following Women’s Day. My first thought was why amplify one voice over millions of saner ones. I let it be and moved on to other flaming issues. Then again this morning was a slightly smaller, more intimate […]

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Blues, Musings, Parenthood, Parenting

Beating The Blues, Tomorrow.

I walk in after dropping my youngest daughter at daycare. I see evidence of the morning rush near the shoe rack. Shoes strewn all over. I am tempted to put them back in order but I move on. I open the door only to stumble on a half naked doll by the cedar chest housing […]

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Musings, SAHM

Tis All About Me This Time

Two years ago, I turned in my badge, laptop and everything else that signified I had a corporate persona. I drove home feeling relieved. I spent the next one year physically tending to my children in an effort to validate my decision. I cooked (and still do) fresh most meals and did away with most […]

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Children, Daycare, Musings, SAHM

Daycare, Me Time and All That Jazz

We set off, Laddu and I each morning. Today she is in an orange dress, a ball of sunshine herself. I belt her in, put her lunch bag on the passenger seat, slide in, turn the radio on and off we go. My fingers keep time with the music on the steering. Her silver anklets […]

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Homemaker, Musings, SAHM

On staying home to raise children

“What does your dad do for a living?” I ask the twins. “Cut” answers Ammu. “Clean” answers Pattu. I repeat my question stressing the ‘for a living’ part. “Oh! you mean earn dollars?” asks Pattu. I nod enthusiastically now that they had caught on. “Type on the keyboard” says Ammu tentatively. I beam and correct […]

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Balance, Musings, SAHM, Work

Wrapping up

Emails. Folders. Badges. Tokens. I had them all cleared, lined up and ready to return. As I shut the laptop with a satisfied click, I realized it marked the end of one period in my life and the start of another. Each eventful in its own right. Laddu on my hip, I turned my attention […]

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Musings, Personal

Gendered Decisions

It is early evening. I type away on my work laptop, wrapping up unfinished work. The crying sounds from above filter through the receiver near my desk. I sigh, push my chair back and sprint upstairs. I pick laddu up and hold her close. Her head slumps on my shoulder and her body relaxes as she […]

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Abstract, Personal, Philosophy, Priorities, Ramblings, Work

Stark reality

In the past few months, a new kind of fixation has taken hold of me. Articles on how women can have it all, cannot have it all, should have it all, should not have it all. All parts of the spectrum have been written, blogged, discussed ad nauseam. As I read each one, I nod […]

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