COVID-19, Daughters, Life, Musings

COVID-19 Diaries: Life Goes On

It is a bright, sunny day. All through the day, I alternate work, kitchen and online studies with the kids. There is a point towards the end of the workday when I throw in the towel, order the kids off their iPad, their IXL sessions be damned and head out for a bit of fresh […]

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Aware parenting, Children, Musings

Untaught Lessons

I am driving home from my brother’s place. Amma is in the passenger seat beside me. Pattu and Laddu are in the back seat bopping to the music streaming from my phone. In the front, we are catching up on the weekend and trading stories. New Rules by Dua Lipa comes on. I lip sync […]

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Daughters, Family, Kids, Love, Musings

Love That Spilleth Over

Laddu peeks in the study and noticing I am on a work call, closes the door gently behind her as she runs upstairs in search of akkas. Her pigtails bounce up and down as she scampers away and my heart swells with a feeling that feels too big for me.  I am disoriented by the […]

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Children, Laddu, Musings

Be Careful What You Wish For

A few weeks back as I nuzzled the top of Laddu’s head as she curled up against me in the afternoon, I felt an intense need to keep her close and never let go. It hit me that this child will soon be in Kindergarten, taking the bus with her sisters. This time I get […]

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Musings

Outpacing Me

Ammu hands out small disco bands when I ask her to. Laddu is trying hard to be still as I first part and then make two braids on either side of her face. Pattu is drying herself and preening in front of the mirror. The changes have been gradual, creeping up until one day they […]

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Daughters, Musings

Girl Code

Laddu is seated at the island, her stubby legs swinging off the tall chair as she watches her sisters come in from school, wash up and take their seats. It is our daily ritual. The kids at the island while I buzz about preparing coffee, setting out snacks and going through their school bags. My […]

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Laddu, Milestones, Musings

Fun In The Sun

After what seemed ages, we had a sunny day today. The kind of day writers eulogize as bright, cheery, clear, warm and happy. A little after breakfast, Ammu and Pattu were nowhere to be seen. After peering through the windows to see if they were biking outside, I looked in the garage and the two […]

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Birthday, Musings, Twins

These Little Girls Of Mine

She stands in her batik printed dress, the silky fabric clinging to her body as she strikes a pose for me. I click and I am taken aback by the young woman staring back at me in the photo. I turn the phone off and suggest that she wear a Capri pant underneath. Year over […]

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Children, Daughters, Friends, Friendship, Musings

Girlfriends

There is frenzied knocking on my bathroom door followed by incoherent yelling. I turn the shower off and manage to catch part of it. “Can Ammu and I go to our friend L and J’s home? Please? Pretty please?” I am impressed by the depth of feelings that pours out of Pattu’s voice. “No! You […]

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Birthday, Happy Birthday, Musings

Serenading My Darlings

I watch from the front door, the stoop damp from all the snow melt as my children trudge through slushy piles of melting snow and ice. Their backpack hangs heavy from their shoulders. They carry a huge unwieldy  trifold board in their hands struggling to keep it off the ground. “I love you.” My voice […]

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Birthday, Daughters, Happy Birthday, Musings, Twins

Birthday Musings

Ammu nuzzles my cheek with her nose, throws her arms around my neck, kisses me and flits off to do whatever it is she is occupied with at the moment. Today she is working on a school project. There are sticky notes all over the place. She painstakingly colors the first American flag and sketches […]

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Musings

They Will Be Okay

It is raining, a miserable grey day punctuated with bouts of soggy wet rain, the kind that does not let up and instead drips all day filling the air with the indescribable smell of things disintegrating and returning to its elemental forms. The alarm goes off and I hit the pause button on the episodes […]

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Appa, Father, Father's Day, Musings

Lucky Dad, Lucky Us

I sit on my recliner idly browsing through pictures on my phone. Marking a particularly nice one as favorite, I turn to show it to Saathi only to find his seat empty. I instinctively turn toward the kids and he is on the floor, Pattu on his lap. The three kids are enjoying their homemade […]

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Daughters, Family, Happiness, Musings

On kids, growing up and gratitude

I stand on the stoop, Laddu in my arms, the fall air refreshingly crisp. Ammu and Pattu walk along the pavement, their strides keeping pace, their arms gesticulating wildly as they make their way to the bus stop. I stand watching till the bus leaves and I head back inside. Laddu demands to be set down […]

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