COVID-19

COVID-19 Diaries: Past Midway Point

I casually look at the calendar one morning and I am taken aback we are in August already. August spells back to school, Fall, cooler weather, and festival season. In any other year, this would have been when I am scouring back to school lists, actively networking to find which kids are in my children’s […]

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Home, Homemaker

COVID-19 Diaries: Cleaning

My calf muscles and hamstrings are sore from bending over one too many times. This time I am on my knees and elbows reaching for a hard to reach inflated ball that is wedged right in the middle of the futon width. I let out a string of curses knowing no one can hear me. […]

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COVID-19

COVID-19 Diaries: Changing Ways of Life

Today, I pulled the plug on our landline. A number we have had since 2001. A number that has followed us through three moves, seen three babies and been a constant across multiple job changes and career changes. The landline has been like a recalcitrant child, acting up, refusing to work and often causing me […]

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COVID-19

COVID-19 Diaries: It Takes A Village

I woke up at 2:45 am to news that Amma will be discharged Friday. By the time I brushed and checked messages again, I learned she would be going home today. The following hour was manic. Phone lines buzzed between continents. Friends and family worked in tandem to make sure she could go home without […]

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COVID-19

COVID-19 Diaries: A Lull

I woke today to news that Amma may be discharged in a day or two. Panic set in. Was she really okay? What if she got sent home and her condition worsened? How will we manage to clean the home and make it ready in a day? What preparation do we need to do in […]

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COVID-19

COVID-19 Diaries: Bone Tired

It has been five days since Amma has been admitted. The communication gaps when trying to coordinate care in a country 8000 miles away is staggering. Basic questions like what medications is she on? Why is she being given the medicines she is being administered? What is the prognosis? Will they check her lungs again? […]

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COVID-19, Family

COVID-19 Diaries: Glimmers of Hope

I am on a work call. I am distracted by incoming messages. At some point, I request the rest of the day off and focus on the messages on my phone instead. There are different sets. One with Amma. One with my siblings. One for my medically competent friends. I share details and worries. I […]

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COVID-19, Family, Musings

COVID-19 Diaries: Direct Hit

Over the weeks, I have mused countless times about how much the pandemic occupies my thoughts. I have imagined in vivid detail what the virus does and can do to our bodies. I have feared that someone dear to me might be affected. Amma spiked a fever ten days ago. A mild fever she said. […]

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Musings

COVID-19 Diaries: Longing

It is past bedtime but the five of us are crowded around my laptop peering into the screen. My siblings and their families are in small rectangles on the display. It is chaotic. It is loud. We sing off key as my niece cuts her birthday cake. The whole meeting is less than thirty minutes. […]

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Journal, nostalgia

COVID-19 Diaries: Reminiscences

Jackfruit. The item remained on our shared grocery list for weeks. Each grocery trip, my finger would hover over it, tempted to strike it off knowing how rare it is to find it locally. Yet, it would stay, a reminder of how random cravings for things from my past can take hold and not let […]

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Anniversary, Journal, Love, Personal

COVID-19 Diaries: Anniversary

Nineteen years is a long time. It is even when you factor in the first few years when you are getting to know the person, the next few years when you are struggling to build a family, the years after that are consumed by nurturing this hard-built family. We have both grown. We have both […]

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Journal, Musings

COVID-19 Diaries: Politics, Race, Children

There is a pain between my shoulder blades that is nagging. It has been a week. I lower myself to the ground so my upper back can find something firm to rest upon. My kaapi is by the side. I snack on cheese curls as I scroll through my feed. Hasan Minhaj’s video has been […]

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Life, Musings, Reflections

COVID-19 Diaries: Ceding Control

Waiting. This word in itself sums up the entirety of my existence these days. I am waiting for many things. Sometimes, it feels like all of my life is one big wait for something to happen. Everything is scripted in my head, the joys, the grief, the anticipation, the highs, the lows. It is frozen […]

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COVID-19, Diary, Musings, Reflections

COVID-19 Diaries: Jugaad

I am in the bedroom browsing through my phone when I hear Laddu’s voice. “Mommy, my glasses broke.” It takes a minute to register. “What do you mean broke? Broke?” The questions swirled. How? When? Who? In the end, I inspected the glasses, pronounced it dead. The lack of emotion, the lack of panic. The […]

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COVID-19, Diary, Musings

COVID-19 Diaries: Wear Those Dresses

I am speaking on a work call, my palms animated as I to explain my position when I spy Laddu outside my study door. Beyond the mullioned door, she mimes something my preoccupied brain fails to comprehend. I shoo her away and adjust focus back to the matter on hand. The call ends and Laddu […]

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COVID-19, Journal, Musings

COVID-19 Diaries: First Lost Tooth

We are all sitting around our dining table. The afternoon sun feels pleasant as it filters through the window even if it is windy and cold outside. The steam swirls and diffuses into the air from the keerai kootu. I serve the children while the husband dutifully mixes the hot rice, ghee, and kootu for […]

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COVID-19, Musings, Reflections

COVID-19 Diaries: The Little Things

With this week, we have all been home for over four weeks with the rare exception of the weekly grocery runs by the husband. Some days, the kids and I step out for some sun keeping to the small grassy oval in front of our home. On adventurous days, I even walk the full loop, […]

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COVID-19, Musings, Reflections

COVID-19 Diaries: Decluttering

I took Friday and today off ostensibly to figure out a schooling plan for the children. My intentions were in the right place. Birthday plans consumed Friday. The weekend was grunt work: grinding batter, laundry, groceries, and just everyday things. Today, however, I decided to tackle the girl’s bedrooms. Growing up, I was the child […]

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COVID-19, Musings, Reflections

COVID-19 Diaries: I Am The Lottery

I see my reflection on the dirty powder room mirror and pause, really pause. The face staring back at me is beautiful. Perhaps it is the lighting or the two years of sticking to a walking routine or just the effect of being indoors all the time for over a month. I like what I […]

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