Category: Portrait Of An Adoption
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Same, But Different
“I want to color my hair blue too!” My youngest, all of six years, holds my hand and swings as she walks. One of her older sisters walks a little ahead of us. We are on our daily evening stroll around our development. The sun has not yet set, bathing us all in a golden…
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Behind the Camera: Crafting Our Family Story on Film
Have you ever wondered what it is like to be the subject in a documentary? Here’s your inside look.
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The Truth Shall Set You Free
Collected in The Smudged Hyphen (2026). The ring lies on the ledge inside the shower stall. I remember to bring it outside when I am done. I wipe it dry and inspect it in the flickering bathroom light. Teal and silver, it is nondescript. I slip it on my finger, it is loose. I slide…
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Adoption Reunion – Pain And Pleasure
“I have something for you” she says, handing a black box the size of a shoebox. My eyes widen at the gesture and I take it from her gratefully. A book lies on top under which there are layers of soft tissue paper. I gently remove each one until this gorgeous doll swathed in maroon…
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#NAM2018 National Adoption Awareness Month: What Can Adoptive Parents Do?
Each November adoptionland is rife with op-eds, hashtags, conferences, panels and social media blitzes by all members of the triad. #FlipTheScript was all I heard over the past few years. I listened hard and reflected on what I heard. Some years, I wrote about my experience with openness in the context of our lives. This…
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Open Adoption: Real Lives. Real Impacts.
My daughter, all of nine and I are standing, facing each other. I hold a tube of cucumber face pack and apply the goo in an even layer all over her face. I avoid her fine blond hair, so pale that I have to look carefully to even see it. Up close, her face is…
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Three Identical Strangers: Thoughts And Angst
Spoiler Alert. I highly recommend you watch the movie before reading I watched the trailer for Three Identical Strangers end of June this year. I was fascinated. Not just because this was a story of adoption but because it seemed too incredible to be true. The dramatic music, the reenactments and the hints of something…
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Open Adoption Goes Both Ways
“I am bored!” The words seem to resound, bounce off the walls of our home over the weekend. If they were not out biking or prone on the sofa, eyes glazed over, watching something inane on the television, they start like cicadas, a lone voice, growing, amplifying into a resonant chorus until I either yell…
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Motherhood, Cleaved
Collected in The Smudged Hyphen (2026). cleave1split or sever (something), especially along a natural line or grain.“the large ax his father used to cleave wood for the fire” cleave2stick fast to.“Rose’s mouth was dry, her tongue cleaving to the roof of her mouth” adhere strongly to (a particular pursuit or belief).“part of why we cleave…
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Of Struggling With Labels
Collected in The Smudged Hyphen (2026). “I don’t like my fake name” muttered Ammu, my first daughter. I was bent over the stove tossing rice noodles in a base of lemon and sesame oil. The heady aroma of tempered mustard and curry leaves almost made me miss the statement. A part of me always attuned…