Children, Daughters, Reflections

The Race Conversation

“What is the meaning of race?” My elbows are flat against the kitchen island, my face level with my girls. “Run?” “Bring children up?” The twins come up with every possible meaning but the one I was curious to know what they knew. We drank our kaapi, set Laddu up so she could Facetime her […]

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Children, Daughters, Life, Musings

Growing Up

I pass Laddu’s bedroom en route to mine. A cutout of a rainbow is taped to her door. The door is closed. It bothers me but I can’t quite figure out why. I straighten the bed in Pattu’s room. All around me are signs of disorganization. I sigh and look up. On the ceiling right […]

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Aware parenting, Children, Musings

Untaught Lessons

I am driving home from my brother’s place. Amma is in the passenger seat beside me. Pattu and Laddu are in the back seat bopping to the music streaming from my phone. In the front, we are catching up on the weekend and trading stories. New Rules by Dua Lipa comes on. I lip sync […]

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Children, Laddu, Musings

Be Careful What You Wish For

A few weeks back as I nuzzled the top of Laddu’s head as she curled up against me in the afternoon, I felt an intense need to keep her close and never let go. It hit me that this child will soon be in Kindergarten, taking the bus with her sisters. This time I get […]

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Children, Everyday, Everyday pleasures, Musings

Waiting For The Shoe To Drop

The sound of drums and cymbals reverberate through the house. I am at the stove sauteeing a mix of onions, tomatoes, ginger and curry leaves. The smell is sharp, pungent and reminiscent of my past. Saathi is sprawled on the sofa watching the Wimbledon Mens Semi-Finals the way I get immersed in books. I envy […]

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Children, Musings, Parenting

Before And After

  Some moments in life are definitive. The Before. The After. I stormed out of the local laboratory, a sobbing Ammu behind me. The walk to the car seemed interminable. I knew I should have stopped, bent to her level, held her close, wiped her tears and walked slowly, together to the car. Yet, I […]

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Children, Daughters, Education, Musings

Shaping Worldview

It is early in the morning. Way too early for eight-year-olds to be up on a weekend. I sip on my coffee as Pattu shuffles a pack of cards in her hand. “Different groups of people,” she reads, pauses and answers with a dramatic voice “Diversity” I reach for the cards and the first that […]

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Children, Daughters, Friends, Friendship, Musings

Girlfriends

There is frenzied knocking on my bathroom door followed by incoherent yelling. I turn the shower off and manage to catch part of it. “Can Ammu and I go to our friend L and J’s home? Please? Pretty please?” I am impressed by the depth of feelings that pours out of Pattu’s voice. “No! You […]

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Children, Family, Life, Personal

Hot Pink Bikes And Time That Zooms Ahead

“I’ll never give up,” Ammu says, her eyes fierce. She straddles the new bike she is testing in the store, balances on her toes and tentatively pushes ahead. The bike wobbles and she stops, tries again and this time sails ahead. She brakes hard and manages not to fall. I watch from my vantage point […]

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Children, holidays, Life, Musings

Tomorrow I will…

“Let’s play konji konji Amma,” she says, her eyes pleading with me. I reluctantly put away my phone and scoop her up. We cuddle, bounce, trade squishy hugs and sit on the recliner looking at clouds through the window. It is mid morning. We have not showered yet. I am loathe to move, to bring […]

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Children, Life, Musings, Parenthood, Parenting

Sisters, Forever.

They sit side by side, their blonde locks sticking up with the static in the air. They leave a trail of hats, winter jackets, gloves and scarfs from the door to the kitchen. I lay their school bags between them and me, a buffer that gives me time to really wake from my nap and […]

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Children, Daycare, Musings, SAHM

Daycare, Me Time and All That Jazz

We set off, Laddu and I each morning. Today she is in an orange dress, a ball of sunshine herself. I belt her in, put her lunch bag on the passenger seat, slide in, turn the radio on and off we go. My fingers keep time with the music on the steering. Her silver anklets […]

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Aware parenting, Children, Musings, Parenting

Little People Observations

“Why do people spit and throw trash on the road Amma? We should teach them not to.” “Why do they keep asking us for our names Amma?” “Why does everyone keep touching our hair Amma?” “So many vehicles on the road is hurting Mother Earth Amma, why don’t people ride bikes or scooter?” If I […]

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Abstract, Bangalore, Children, Community, Desi, Diary

Little People Problems

“I can’t believe foreigners are in our apartment!” “Won’t they think India is dirty?” Her face wrinkles in concern as she eyes Ammu and Pattu as they soar on the squeaky swings. I look at them too and answer the girl in front of me with questions of my own. We trade replies and she […]

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