On pins and needles

pinsandneedles

One of the defining parts of being pregnant for me is dealing with gestational diabetes. It is something that requires conscious thought, planning and management on a daily basis. Right from remembering to give myself shots, finding a spot that is not sore from repeated pricks, meal planning, remembering to test, remembering to log and following up with the doctors, GD is something I cannot wish away. Most days are good. I take it in stride. I remind myself I am doing this not for me but for the life growing within. What I do impacts not just me but another living being.

Then there are days like today when I am ravenous. I eye that additional spoon of rice or the tiny Milky Way bar in the fridge with resentment. I feel sorry for myself. I look at the calendar and feel angry at the number of weeks left. I mope and throw myself a pity party.

I then reach out to my online support group. My trusty forums where countless folks like me are counting down, venting, ranting and keeping themselves sane. I feel a smidgen of relief when I hear of others sharing their experiences. There is light at the end of tunnel I tell myself. I promise myself a tiny treat if I stick to my portion size for the next meal.

I cheer up and look at the clock. It tells me I have forty-five minutes before my next snack. The smile is back and I realize in a few hours, it will be one day closer to D-Day.

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