Yesterday was one of those days when I woke with a heaviness in my heart. The kind you keep to yourself. All day, it lay there subtly beneath the layers without rearing its head.
Sitting across my amma, it finally popped out. The untold, unasked questions. Are you feeling sad I asked. Did not think anyone would remember she said. I do. I have been dreading the day I said.
How do you go about recognizing anniversaries when the person you associate most with it is no longer physically there? Is it still a happy remembrance or a reminder of what you have lost? Even as you feel the loss each day, some days accentuate it more than others.
Time does dull the pain but you realize it lies there, throbbing under the surface. People fade. Memories don’t.