A door closes

I sit back this Sunday night, browsing aimlessly. A smile plays on my lips for I know I will not be walking into work tomorrow. This past week, I closed one chapter of my working life. A week from now, I may start another. In the meanwhile, I have a week off to clean, decompress and get ready for the newer challenges.

Over the past year, a feeling of restlessness crept into my soul, slowly snaking its way through the core of my being. Little things added up to a point where I felt like I had to take pause, reflect on where I was and how to change course. The casualty, it turns out was my job. The long hours, the more than frequent weekend work, the sense of doing something I felt I was not the best at added up. I fiddled around with my resume. Editing a section at a time. Working on it piecemeal. In between reading for my exam or with Facebook open on a browser window. One weekend it happened, I shot an email to a few friends I knew. I was feeling restless. Would they know of positions in their company?

This Friday when I walked out of the building, the sky was overcast, the cold bitter. I left behind close to five years of memories. Yet, I walked out alone. Just like any other day. Starting my car, I sat for a moment before I pulled out, tears falling thick and fast. I am sentimental like that.

Snatches of images from the day played in my head. The colleague from a floor above, popping into my cube shock writ large on his face. A warm hug, a promise to keep in touch. Another colleague, someone I have worked with incessantly over the past five years passes me by, indifferent. Touching notes via email render me emotional. I scan through the folders of my laptop. One last time looking for scraps of personal information left behind by oversight. I open the cabinets. They look clean. And bare.

I bundle up all remnant relics of my association with the company and stop by my managers desk. Handing over the laptop and associated paraphernalia, I say a brisk bye and walk out. I feel light and unburdened.

All weekend long, I process the end. And I smile.

10 thoughts on “A door closes

  1. Wonderful news Laksh! Change is good and wish you the very best. 5 years is a good time to make a change when you are in the verge of completing your MBA. I am so happy for you.
    Talk to you soon. Love to the kutties.

  2. Firstly, congratulations! You’ve taken the ‘pause’ that many (like me) aren’t bold enough to take (to reflect). Secondly, thanks for blogging about it. It may someday help some of us (like me) in making that decision. Lastly…here’s hoping you will find what you’re looking for. Good luck to you!

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